How can I move on from my ex?

Hope it helps! 🌷

Follow No-contact: I know this fact that you will keep getting urges to check their profiles or just send them a text. So it is better to block them. You don't have to keep an eye on every activities or updates by them. Let them do what they want to.

God will never take away anything, which was meant for you!

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Instead of that put your time and energy in up-skilling and grooming yourself. When you shift your focus from worrying to building yourself, you will eventually meet good people. Then it will become easy for you to get over from the past.

Acceptance: Accept it that the person who used to close to you is no more an important part of your life. Don't run from your emotions. The more you run from it the more they will come after you. It is better to feel it at the present moment.

Have Faith: Leave everything on God. As I mentioned in the beginning. If the person is meant for you, he/she will come back. If not so, God will give you signs. Ask him to give you the strength to accept the situation and move on.

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Last but not the least, you choose to stay in the same state of mind because you think that they were the perfect fit for you.

Remember one thing-

Forgive but don't forget: Try to forgive them for whatever happened. Blame game will give you nothing at the end, it will only take away your peace. Just think that they were right at their place and you are at yours. It is just, you both are not right for each other. Take lessons from it and don't forget the mistakes you did.

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REMINDER- Nothing is going to change instantly, all these points discussed will take time and patience. It can take days, weeks or months to move on. So, take one step each day slowly and heal yourself.

Delete everything: Remove every picture, text, audio, gift or anything related to them. It seems difficult but this is the only way. You will get reminders of them if you keep revisiting those memories.

Now, coming to the detailed analysis - How to really move on?

I’m wondering about attachment and transference with the therapist and the idea of escape and fantasy? How much do you think your strong feelings, constant thoughts, desires to be with your therapist are a way to escape from your present life? I wonder if the transference serves another purpose than to show us our wounds and/or past experiences, but is a present coping strategy for managing what we don’t want to face (even if unconsciously) in the present—-current relationships, life circumstances, etc. Can anyone relate to this concept of escape in relation to their therapy relationship? How does this play out for you?

If the relation was so serious for them, then they wouldn't have left you but they had fixed things.

Don't seek for closure: In many cases, situation will be created where you will not get any reason why it didn't worked out. For that time, their actions will be your answer. No one knows better than you, how they ended things or treated you.

The first and foremost thing you can do is, to understand that this person wasn't for you.

Is there anything you did that you regret? If so, what is it, and why?

Get rid of this state and keep one thing in your mind- there are so many good people waiting for you. So don't waste your energy unnecessarily.

Talk about it: It may sound quite weird but do it anyways. Express yourself. Rant about your thoughts and feelings to a close friend. If you don't have anyone to share with. Then write it in a diary/journal or record a voice note. Trust me, you will get relief by letting that energy out.